Oh, interesting story. I like the peek into Darla's pre-vampire life. The lack of gratitude towards the Native American slayer seems very in line with the actual history of colonialism in the US.
I wasn't reading carefully enough at the beginning and I missed the part about Virginia being a girl, so at first when you write that Virginia tells the story I thought it was some kind of metaphor!
I'm still a little confused about the bit about Darla's name near the end though. She like her name "much better than the one who'd been promised a better world." But how had her name been promised a better world? This would make sense if she'd been the one named Virginia. But as is... I dunno, I think I was looking for meaning that wasn't there to find. Maybe if you changed it to "much better than the name of the one who had been promised a better world" it'd be clearer?
(Also, just let me know if the conscrit is undesired, I can edit the comment and not leave similar ones in the future.)
But yeah, good story. What a gut punch to think of poor 15 year-old future-Darla having to take over the family business because her mom's wasting away, only to then waste away from presumably the same illness less than ten years later. Ouch.
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I wasn't reading carefully enough at the beginning and I missed the part about Virginia being a girl, so at first when you write that Virginia tells the story I thought it was some kind of metaphor!
I'm still a little confused about the bit about Darla's name near the end though. She like her name "much better than the one who'd been promised a better world." But how had her name been promised a better world? This would make sense if she'd been the one named Virginia. But as is... I dunno, I think I was looking for meaning that wasn't there to find. Maybe if you changed it to "much better than the name of the one who had been promised a better world" it'd be clearer?
(Also, just let me know if the conscrit is undesired, I can edit the comment and not leave similar ones in the future.)
But yeah, good story. What a gut punch to think of poor 15 year-old future-Darla having to take over the family business because her mom's wasting away, only to then waste away from presumably the same illness less than ten years later. Ouch.