Ficlet: Pull Out The Pin

[beer_good_foamy]

stormwreath got the prompt "Buffy kills something with a kitchen implement and has sex with Spike afterwards" from gabrielleabelle and penny_lane_42 and suggested turning it into a ficathon. His version is here.

Title: Pull Out The Pin
Author: Beer Good (beer_good_foamy)
Rating: PG13
Fandom/timeline: Buffyverse, post-series
Word Count: 300
Pairing: Buffy/Spike (duh)
Summary: Buffy kills something with a kitchen implement and has sex with Spike afterwards.

Pull Out The Pin

Spike took off his boots, carefully opened the door and tip-toed inside the dark flat, quiet as a large, leather-clad, slightly drunk mouse. He had just managed to close the door behind him when the lights came on, casting the hallway in bright light and dark shadows. "Christ, Slayer, scare the pants off of..." Uh-oh. Buffy stood there in her nighty, hair up in curlers, rolling pin in hand and murder in her eyes.

"Don't move, Spike."

"OK, so I stayed out a little later than I said, but..."

Her eyes narrowed. "No, really, don't move."

Quick as a whip, Buffy raised the rolling pin and hurled it past Spike's ear. It struck something behind him with a wet crunching sound, and Spike turned around just in time to see one of the shadows slump to the ground with a faint moan.

"Shadow demons?"

"Yup. Pablo Nerudas or whatever," Buffy nodded with a smile as she started to relax. "Andrew came over to do my hair, and he was going to drop a demon off with Giles later. It got out, and since it turns out they breed like bunnies, I've been up all night killing them."

"Oh." Spike drew a biologically unnecessary but still somehow very rewarding breath. "Any more of the blighters?"

"Nope. All done." She wiped the sweat from her forehead, then put her hand to her mussed hair, pulled one of the curlers out and pouted. "And I'm going to have to do this all over again. Unnh. I look like a freak."

"So if you've been up all night killing things..." Spike grinned and stepped closer. "How freaky are we talking?"

Buffy turned the lights off again.

"What are you -"

"Scaring the pants off you." Zip. "Booo."

"OK, I told you once, that's cheating."

Comments

[stormwreath.livejournal.com]

Hee. I loved the imagery of Buffy as Flo from 'Andy Capp' (which is a comparison I doubt would occur to many people who aren't British...)

[garnigal.livejournal.com]

Heh. As soon as you said it, my lightbulb went off.

Apparently Canadians get that reference too. :)

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

HA! That was exactly the image I was going for! Thanks! (Andy Capp is actually pretty well-known over here. I think he's even been adopted by a football team or two.)

[moscow-watcher.livejournal.com]

quiet as a large, leather-clad, slightly drunk mouse

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

*bows* Thanks!

[petzipellepingo.livejournal.com]

quiet as a large, leather-clad, slightly drunk mouse
Hee!

Buffy stood there in her nighty, hair up in curlers, rolling pin in hand and murder in her eyes.

Double hee!

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

[gabrielleabelle.livejournal.com]

I would like to buy this fic a drink and take it home with me.

"OK, I told you once, that's cheating."

Hee. Oh, Buffy...

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

I would like to buy this fic a drink and take it home with me.

I have it on good authority that this fic is very easily persuaded.

[candleanfeather.livejournal.com]

I love your slayer-vampire version of the classic domestic scene.

And "quiet as a large, leather-clad, slightly drunk mouse. " Spike is a winner. :-)

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

I love your slayer-vampire version of the classic domestic scene.

It's a classic for a reason. Next, I'm going to write a story where Spike walks in on Buffy standing on a chair, scared to death of a mouse... or possibly not. :-)

[rebcake.livejournal.com]

I don't know what tickled me most!

a large, leather-clad, slightly drunk mouse

Buffy stood there in her nighty, hair up in curlers

"Shadow demons?" "Yup. Pablo Nerudas or whatever."

*falls over. again*

At least there was a plausible explanation for the curlers...Andrew! *snerk*

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

"Shadow demons?" "Yup. Pablo Nerudas or whatever."

It's one of the sneakier Doctor Who crossovers I've done... :-)

At least there was a plausible explanation for the curlers...Andrew! *snerk*

I was going to have Buffy smoking as well to really capture that Flo Capp look, but I just couldn't come up with a reason why she would. Apart from the ending

[deird1]

Nicely done!

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

[angearia.livejournal.com]

Uh oh, we're doing it again...

"Scaring the pants off you." Zip. "Booo."

Hee!

*goes to think up something to post*

[stormwreath.livejournal.com]

Uh oh, we're doing it again...

A rocket launcher is NOT a kitchen implement.

...except, possibly, in the Summers household. ;-)

[penny-lane-42.livejournal.com]

Pablo Nerudas or whatever *dies laughing*

"Scaring the pants off you." Zip. "Booo." Buffy wins at life, cheating or no.

Brilliant!

And I'm so pleased that everyone took my demands for such a story seriously!

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

And I'm so pleased that everyone took my demands for such a story seriously!

This is fandom. We take everything seriously - especially the things we don't take seriously. *reads that back* Yeah. :-)

[cafedemonde.livejournal.com]

Awww, cute and love Spike making with the excuses asap.

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

love Spike making with the excuses asap

I think most guys would in that situation. :-)

[electricalgwen.livejournal.com]

HEEEEE.

...a large, leather-clad, slightly drunk mouse. Awesome. I also love the cliched classic, "...a biologically unnecessary but still somehow very rewarding breath."

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Thanks a lot! I like to think there's some situations where you can get away with using clichés... :-)

[larabeckinsale.livejournal.com]

"What are you -"
"Scaring the pants off you." Zip. "Booo."
"OK, I told you once, that's cheating."

LMAO

I love you guys for doing this!

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Thanks a lot! And I love you for reading!

Following link from angearia's journal

[ohwaluvusbab.livejournal.com]

Yes! I love this! Totally them.

Re: Following link from angearia's journal

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Thanks, glad you liked!

[zanthinegirl.livejournal.com]

"Shadow demons?"

"Yup. Pablo Nerudas or whatever,"

Bwaaa-haa-haa!! Dctor Who Crossover FTW!!

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Thanks! I figured Buffy would be less impressed with them than the Doctor was... :-)

[dontgetanyolder.livejournal.com]

hee! this was brilliant.

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

[rahirah]

Best meme ever!

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Improvised ficathons ftw!

[louise39.livejournal.com]

Love this story of slayer-vampire domesticity. The image of Buffy in Andrew-styled curlers wielding a rolling pin is hlarious.
It's nice to laugh.
edited for spelling

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Thanks a lot!

The image of Buffy in Andrew-styled curlers wielding a rolling pin is hlarious.

I was hoping it would be. It's such a classic scene, I'm surprised we don't see it in Buffy fic more often... Well, OK, not really THAT surprised.

[lavastar.livejournal.com]

Ahahaha, too cute. I love all the little details, like quiet as a large, leather-clad, slightly drunk mouse, and Andrew doing Buffy's hair, and the reference to 'Gone'. Also just the fact that we have an example of two members of a couple going off and doing separate things in a fic - cuddly domestic scenes are fun and all, but seriously, they still are two different people!

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Thanks a lot!

Also just the fact that we have an example of two members of a couple going off and doing separate things in a fic - cuddly domestic scenes are fun and all, but seriously, they still are two different people!

Exactly. (For the record, Spike was at a poetry slam. After the first time he dragged Buffy along to one of those, they came to a tacit agreement not to repeat the experience.)

[ubi4soft.livejournal.com]

You guys made me look it up in the dictionary for kitchen appliances!

Very funny!

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Yay for new knowledge! Thanks!

[thisficklemob.livejournal.com]

Aww, yay! People have already called my favorite lines, but the large... slightly-drunk mouse is a classic.

And this is hilarious: "Scaring the pants off you." Zip. "Booo."

Just the image of Buffy saying "Booo" to Spike's bits is priceless.

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Thanks! *resists urge to make "scared stiff" joke*

Glee

[jamalov29.livejournal.com]

This fic has the same delicious effect as a Spring day filled with sunshine.:)
Thank you.

Re: Glee

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Oh, thank you!

[goodbyebird]

quiet as a large, leather-clad, slightly drunk mouse.

hee! Loved the ending too!

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

[songokuu.livejournal.com]

Ha ha! Love the fade-to-blackness. It's purrfect. XD

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

(Very belated) thanks! :)