Silly chilly meta

[beer_good_foamy]

So I'm snowed in and watching the winter olympics and reading my flist at the same time and the thought struck me:

Let's say all the Buffyverse people (well, the ones who are still alive) were also snowed in and lounging in front of a sports channel. Which disciplines would they be watching?

Buffy watches figure skating. Of course. Though if one of the younger girls should drop by, she quickly switches over to downhill to show Slayer solidarity with Lindsay Vonn and Anja Pärson.

Willow watches the halfpipe competition with Kennedy. That's about it; she doesn't watch a lot of sports since that incident with the short track competition in 2002:

Magic control and exciting TV don't always mix.

Kennedy, however, watches alpine and freestyle skiing and snowboarding. She prefers traditional alpine skiing, ski cross and snowboard giant slalom to moguls and halfpipe since she figures the fastest across the finish line should win, not whoever sucks up to the style judges.

Xander watches women's curling. He's also a fan of cross-country skiing, especially the 50K classic – there's something to be said for sports that require tactics, patience and endurance rather than superstrength and superspeed.

Giles is fascinated by biathlon; the mixture of physical exertion and precision. He's suggested it to Buffy as a training method for new Slayers. Surprisingly, Buffy had no problem with the guns, but refused to participate in any sport that required her to be out for hours in the snow.

Dawn generally thinks winter sports are pretty lame. Especially figure skating. She watches a lot of the behind-the-scenes reports, though, and knows more about waxing skis than she does about skiing.

Spike watches any sport where a Brit is in with a chance. So no winter olympics for Spike.

Angel watches hockey. Of course. He also watches bobsledding, more out of puzzlement than anything else; why would anyone who's not trying to atone for a dark past do that to themselves?

Connor doesn't watch ice hockey. He's not sure why.

Illyria finds passing amusement in watching ski jumping. Human beings trying to fly are somehow almost endearing... she means pathetic. Illyria doesn't find humans endearing. Uh-uh.

Gunn watches ice dancing. Don't tell anyone.

Lorne watched the opening ceremony.

Vi watches skeleton (like luge, except head-first). I'm not saying she doesn't cringe and cover her eyes a lot, but she watches it. Someone has to.

Anne is usually busy, but occasionally joins Kennedy to watch the freestyle events since she appreciates anyone who can improvise in mid-air and land on their feet.

Oz watches curling. Not for the same reasons Xander does, he genuinely likes watching rocks slide slowly across the ice.

Riley watches downhill. It's a Man's sport.

Andrew watches downhill. It's a sport with men in tights.

Ethan watches short track. See above.

Faith is actually in Vancouver right now. She played the opening game for the US women's hockey team – or rather, 11 seconds of it; she was then suspended for the rest of the games after rather spectacularly forgetting the no-tackling rule. She was barely off the ice before she was signed by the Boston Bruins, though.

ETA: D'oh! Forgot Andrew and Connor for some reason. Added them.

Comments

[petzipellepingo.livejournal.com]

Of course. He also watches bobsledding, more out of puzzlement than anything else; why would anyone who's not trying to atone for a dark past do that to themselves?


"snorfle"

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

There are a lot of strange sports out there, but bob has to be one of the weirdest. It's like a soapbox derby without wheels for grown men. Plus, you know, Angel's probably flashing back to that fun summer he spent in a box at the bottom of the ocean.

[gabrielleabelle.livejournal.com]

*laughs openly*

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

:-)

[xlivvielockex.livejournal.com]

The Spike one made me laugh out loud. As well as the Faith one.

And I love curling. I wonder what that says about me. I think I'm with Oz. The best curling quote I ever found "I first became aware of curling about 7 years ago. I've found, once you start watching, you can't stop. It's like being stoned and being amazed by your hand. You just can't look away."

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Oh, I think curling is a fantastic sport, and your quote pretty much explains it. It's one of the very few sports I know that takes its time. Every other sport keeps getting faster, harder, higher, longer... curling takes hours to play, and even if there were a pro league with tens of thousands of spectators per game and MLB wages you couldn't play it any faster. Plus, it's a rule that the winners buy drinks for the losers afterwards. How cool is that?

[opportunemoment.livejournal.com]

Bwahaha, Riley and Andrew. And Faith! :D

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Thanks! Well, if the Canadian and US women's teams are made up of Slayers, it would explain a thing or two... (between them, they had a combined goal difference of 72-3 in the first three games. I'm not ruling out superpowers.)

[deird1]

Connor doesn't watch ice hockey. He's not sure why.

Oh... *sniffles*

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

*nods* Unfortunately, Chipmunk Robots On Ice isn't an olympic sport.

[gillo]

Spike watches any sport where a Brit is in with a chance. So no winter olympics for Spike.

Except possibly the women's skeleton in which we won the gold medal? Or the curling?

(Grrr)

*g*

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

You're saying Spike would consider curling a sport? ;-) Even with a soul, I think Spike would explode with frustration every time the British team deliberately scored 0...

[snickfic]

Vi's is definitely my favorite. Hee!

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

I think it's the default way of watching skeleton. :-)

[rebcake.livejournal.com]

I'm with Illyria on this one. Except that all sorts of these crazy-ass kids seem to be going airborne, not just the ski jumpers. Sometimes you just have to come down with a little ice dancing, with its relaxing lack of death-defying feats.

Maybe I'm with Vi.

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

There's been a lot of flying, yeah. Anja Pärson pretty much set a new Swedish women's ski-jumping record in the downhill, though she might have gotten some points deducted for landing on her ass.

Sometimes you just have to come down with a little ice dancing, with its relaxing lack of death-defying feats.

Curling. Join us. Join ussssss.

[caira.livejournal.com]

*snort* Hee. (OTOH, Buffy never found out how much Tara liked figure skating, and can't work out why Willow won't watch it with her anymore.)

As for the short track, I still crack up every time I see that. He did Australia proud, that boy. :p

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

(OTOH, Buffy never found out how much Tara liked figure skating, and can't work out why Willow won't watch it with her anymore.)

*sniff*

He did Australia proud, that boy.

Yup. And the great part is he got to the final in the exact same way.

[slaymesoftly.livejournal.com]

*snerk* more cookies - with funny faces on them

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

*munches in a funny way*

[a2zmom.livejournal.com]

Faith is my favorite. Of course that's what happened.

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

I have it on good authority that all the goalies in the entire tournament lobbied to have her suspended before she got a chance to show her slapshot.

[angearia.livejournal.com]

Dawn generally thinks winter sports are pretty lame. Especially figure skating. She watches a lot of the behind-the-scenes reports, though, and knows more about waxing skis than she does about skiing.

Oh, really now?

:D

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Next thing you'll be telling me Tara fights evil disembodied penises (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0988043/), too. ;-)

[mabus101.livejournal.com]

I must be missing something re: Connor. Bad memory, I guess.

I have a suspicion Slayers would be banned from competing if the Olympic committee knew about them. No one could beat that except on 'roids, after all, and maybe not then.

I'll keep quiet for Faith's sake, though. ;)

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

I must be missing something re: Connor. Bad memory, I guess.

It's a reference to the Angel episode where Angel buys "itty bitty hockey sticks" for baby Connor to play with in a few years (http://www.vrya.net/bdb/clip.php?clip=6116).

I have a suspicion Slayers would be banned from competing if the Olympic committee knew about them.

At least until they realise how much more they can charge for the TV rights. Plus, Faith and Buffy have been working on making synchronised slaying an olympic category for years now, about time they got a chance to show it off. :-)

[curiouswombat.livejournal.com]

Vi watches skeleton because that way she gets Spike all to herself.

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

*see icon*

[ozma914.livejournal.com]

It's perfect! I do have trouble mixing Dawn up with M.T.'s character from "Ice Princess", though.

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

Simple: Dawn is the one who speaks Sumerian and knows how to handle a crossbow. (Granted, I haven't seen Ice Princess, but somehow I doubt she does the same thing there.)

[moscow-watcher.livejournal.com]

Connor doesn't watch ice hockey. He's not sure why.

Mwahaha!

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

:-)

[fluffybkitty.livejournal.com]

I was watching the womens USA v SWEDEN game yesterday and kept thinking this would be Faith's sport for sure :)

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Absolutely. She gets to hit people, carry a big stick, and go to the penalty box to repent now and then. :-)

[coffeecats.livejournal.com]

"Spike watches any sport where a Brit is in with a chance. So no winter olympics for Spike".

This reminded me of watching "Eddie The Eagle" back in the 80's. Which has nothing to do with your entry whatsover :)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eddie_%22The_Eagle%22_Edwards

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

I *love* Eddie The Eagle. I saw an interview with him just the other day. Apparently he's still the best ski jumper Britain has ever had, and he's still available if the British Ski Association (or whatever it's called) wants to give him a call. :-)

[penny-lane-42.livejournal.com]

OH MY GOODNESS.

This made my entire day. I was going to let you know which ones were particularly awesome...but they were all particuarly awesome because you absolutely nailed each characterization. I adore it.

Buffy and Olympics! Yay!

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Thanks a lot!

[goodbyebird]

These are funny and really hit the spot!

Spike watches any sport where a Brit is in with a chance. So no winter olympics for Spike.

*snorfles and innocently props up her Norwegian flag*

Lorne watched the opening ceremony.

Of course he does ♥ And the Oz one is dead on. Thanks for sharing :D

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Thanks a lot!

*snorfles and innocently props up her Norwegian flag*

How'd you do in the men's relay, anyway? :-P

[candleanfeather.livejournal.com]

Absolutely adores the very different POVs from Riley and Andrew about downhill. Excellent! :D

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Thanks a lot!

[elisi]

Just realised that I never commented on this, which is a crime because it's BRILLIANT! (Especially love Gunn and Lorne.)

ETA: This might be the best description of curling ever (by A.A.Gill):

...a subtle mélange of darts, snooker and room service, performed in slow motion.

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Thanks a lot! And I love that definition.

[sam-arkand.livejournal.com]

Good call on Faith! I always wanted to write a fic where she introduces Buffy to beer-league hockey during a slow winter day in Cleveland. With the other teams being demons playing by their own eccentric rules...

"Watch! Black and gold, on the ice!"

Rona watches bobsled and slalom. Naturally, rooting for the Jamaicans and Kwame Nkrumah-Acheampong!

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

Hmmm, I really like that idea. Generally speaking, I really like the idea of Faith in hockey gear. Especially if it involves her teaching Buffy things... Hmmm, I say. Hmmm.