Ficlet: The Brian Situation
Oct. 19th, 2014 10:23 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
beer_good_foamySo here's a fic I found loitering half-finished on my hard drive. Reading ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
mcjulie's post on Hell's Bells some time ago, I realised there's a minor character in Buffy who gets a few intriguing lines, who openly flirts with one of the scoobies, and has, to the best of my knowledge, never had any fic written about him: that demon guy with the horns that Dawn talks to at Anya and Xander's wedding. Hell, even the script just mentions him as Demon Teen. So I started wondering, and... well, here's what came out.
ETA: There's now a spin-off fic for this one, bydragonyphoenix: Extraneous Tomes
Title: The Brian Situation
Author: Beer Good (beer_good_foamy)
Fandom: Buffy, post-season 6
Rating: PG13
Word count: ~950
Summary: Dawn has a date. Buffy has mom hair.
The Brian Situation
The sound of footsteps thundered down the stairs heading for the front door like, whatsitcalled, the cobbler effect? where a siren goes past you and changes pitch in the middle:
"...andIpromiseI'llbebackbytenOKgreatbye!"
Even Slayer senses aren't keen enough to pick up on a 16-year-old girl talking at top speed. Slayer reflexes, of course, are a different matter, as are big sister instincts that something is going on. Buffy quickly placed herself between Dawn and the front door, forcing her little sister to brake hard and somewhat awkwardly in her high heels. "Come again?"
Dawn hesitated and pulled at her skirt. "...I'll be back by ten?"
"Uh-huh, and before that?"
"Um… Fine." Dawn crossed her arms and pulled herself up to her full height, towering over Buffy. "I have a date."
"A- Oh." Okay, this was one of those handle-this-in-an-adult-but-not-stuffy-way things. Because, well, she had told her it was OK as long as they talked about it first, even if some part of her had hoped it would be, like, 10 years from now or something, but... Dawn was looking at her as if she expected a reaction so she had better come up with one. "OK, that's... Great! Do I know him? Is he in your class…?"
"Who said it's a him?" Dawn allowed Buffy about half a second of bad-parenting self-reproach before continuing. "Just kidding. No, but his name is Brian, we met at Xander and Anya's not-wedding and hung out a bit. He's about my age, and he's into some stuff I'm into, and we could just talk, you know? Plus he has the cutest little horns, and - "
Buffy's eyes immediately narrowed. "Horns?"
"...Crap."
"HORNS? Your date is a demon?"
Dawn held up her hands. "OK, Pot the Kettle Slayer. Yes, he is, but... Wait, who'd you think I'd meet at Xander's wedding? It's pretty much either demons or one of Xander's cousins, and don't tell me that'd be less squicky."
"Um..."
"Look, I know all the objections here. I mean, my big sister's the Slayer. My life is pretty much demons and vampires and witch... Uh, whichever 24/7. Which I'm OK with, really, but there’s so much in my life I can’t even bring up in casual conversation. But Brian already knows about all that stuff, so… Also,” she added, “I live in Sunnydale, so odds are I’d end up dating a demon anyway, and at least this way I know about it beforehand."
"You’ve really thought this through, huh." Buffy paused and nodded. "Brian the demon. Do you even know what kind of demon - "
Dawn sighed and rolled her eyes in a way that's only genetically possible between the ages of 13 and 17. "Fulgrash demon. Sotos codex, pages 421 through 429. Diurnal, vegetarian, except Brian's vegan which is pretty cool, mostly urbanized, no recorded human sacrifices or any other form of aggression since before 1813. Come on, Buffy, it's me. Besides, he knows you're the Slayer and he asked me out, and was totally nervous about it, oh, and his dad knows Clem, so how bad can he be?"
"You want me to answer that or just - “ Buffy paused long enough to realise that she was channeling Giles, and then shuddered. "Urgh. Whatever," she continued, briefly wondering if people still said 'whatever'. "So... Well, um... I mean..."
"Oh, for... Mom gave me The Talk when I was 13. A-and Tara last year." There was a brief hint of pain in Dawn's eyes, and Buffy almost asked about it before stopping herself. Tara had been in the ground for two months, grieving has to stop sometime. "It's just one date. We're going to have coffee, and talk, and catch a movie. And yes, I have protection." She opened her purse to show a bottle of holy water and a stake. "So, please?"
"You'll be back by ten?"
Dawn grinned. "I'll be back by ten. Promise."
"OK." Buffy moved out of the way but held on to her sister's shoulder for a few seconds. "But you know you can talk to me about anything, right? Whatever it is."
Dawn gave her a quick hug. "I know. Love ya."
"TEN!" Buffy yelled as the door slammed.
Alone in her house, Buffy relaxed a bit. That went reasonably well, she supposed. OK, feelings slightly hurt by the not being let in on until the last second, but... Dawn had spent most of the summer burying herself in research, and it was nice to see her excited about something. Besides, Buffy had to admit, her little sister was growing up fairly responsible and had earned some trust. I mean, just look at the thoroughness of her research methods, she thought as she casually strolled over to the bookcase and casually pulled down a volume completely at random that just happened to be the same one Dawn had mentioned had information on her not-boyfriend. By an extraordinary coincidence, it opened to page 421. Buffy casually wondered how Giles would react at Dawn making notes in his precious books, noting cross references, doodling around a couple of words, underlining and highlighting bits like "diurnal", "vegetarian", "non-violent", and -
- and come to think of it, Buffy had earned some time off herself. Treating herself to coffee and a movie sounded like a good idea. She did have this new trenchcoat and sunglasses she'd been meaning to try on. She'd just sit inconspicuously in a corner, watching the people. Couldn't hurt to keep up with what the kids were up to these days. Maybe underlining "anatomically compatible with Homo Sapiens" in books was just some new teenage fad.
mcjulie's post on Hell's Bells some time ago, I realised there's a minor character in Buffy who gets a few intriguing lines, who openly flirts with one of the scoobies, and has, to the best of my knowledge, never had any fic written about him: that demon guy with the horns that Dawn talks to at Anya and Xander's wedding. Hell, even the script just mentions him as Demon Teen. So I started wondering, and... well, here's what came out.ETA: There's now a spin-off fic for this one, by
dragonyphoenix: Extraneous TomesTitle: The Brian Situation
Author: Beer Good (
beer_good_foamy)Fandom: Buffy, post-season 6
Rating: PG13
Word count: ~950
Summary: Dawn has a date. Buffy has mom hair.
The Brian Situation
The sound of footsteps thundered down the stairs heading for the front door like, whatsitcalled, the cobbler effect? where a siren goes past you and changes pitch in the middle:
"...andIpromiseI'llbebackbytenOKgreatbye!"
Even Slayer senses aren't keen enough to pick up on a 16-year-old girl talking at top speed. Slayer reflexes, of course, are a different matter, as are big sister instincts that something is going on. Buffy quickly placed herself between Dawn and the front door, forcing her little sister to brake hard and somewhat awkwardly in her high heels. "Come again?"
Dawn hesitated and pulled at her skirt. "...I'll be back by ten?"
"Uh-huh, and before that?"
"Um… Fine." Dawn crossed her arms and pulled herself up to her full height, towering over Buffy. "I have a date."
"A- Oh." Okay, this was one of those handle-this-in-an-adult-but-not-stuffy-way things. Because, well, she had told her it was OK as long as they talked about it first, even if some part of her had hoped it would be, like, 10 years from now or something, but... Dawn was looking at her as if she expected a reaction so she had better come up with one. "OK, that's... Great! Do I know him? Is he in your class…?"
"Who said it's a him?" Dawn allowed Buffy about half a second of bad-parenting self-reproach before continuing. "Just kidding. No, but his name is Brian, we met at Xander and Anya's not-wedding and hung out a bit. He's about my age, and he's into some stuff I'm into, and we could just talk, you know? Plus he has the cutest little horns, and - "
Buffy's eyes immediately narrowed. "Horns?"
"...Crap."
"HORNS? Your date is a demon?"
Dawn held up her hands. "OK, Pot the Kettle Slayer. Yes, he is, but... Wait, who'd you think I'd meet at Xander's wedding? It's pretty much either demons or one of Xander's cousins, and don't tell me that'd be less squicky."
"Um..."
"Look, I know all the objections here. I mean, my big sister's the Slayer. My life is pretty much demons and vampires and witch... Uh, whichever 24/7. Which I'm OK with, really, but there’s so much in my life I can’t even bring up in casual conversation. But Brian already knows about all that stuff, so… Also,” she added, “I live in Sunnydale, so odds are I’d end up dating a demon anyway, and at least this way I know about it beforehand."
"You’ve really thought this through, huh." Buffy paused and nodded. "Brian the demon. Do you even know what kind of demon - "
Dawn sighed and rolled her eyes in a way that's only genetically possible between the ages of 13 and 17. "Fulgrash demon. Sotos codex, pages 421 through 429. Diurnal, vegetarian, except Brian's vegan which is pretty cool, mostly urbanized, no recorded human sacrifices or any other form of aggression since before 1813. Come on, Buffy, it's me. Besides, he knows you're the Slayer and he asked me out, and was totally nervous about it, oh, and his dad knows Clem, so how bad can he be?"
"You want me to answer that or just - “ Buffy paused long enough to realise that she was channeling Giles, and then shuddered. "Urgh. Whatever," she continued, briefly wondering if people still said 'whatever'. "So... Well, um... I mean..."
"Oh, for... Mom gave me The Talk when I was 13. A-and Tara last year." There was a brief hint of pain in Dawn's eyes, and Buffy almost asked about it before stopping herself. Tara had been in the ground for two months, grieving has to stop sometime. "It's just one date. We're going to have coffee, and talk, and catch a movie. And yes, I have protection." She opened her purse to show a bottle of holy water and a stake. "So, please?"
"You'll be back by ten?"
Dawn grinned. "I'll be back by ten. Promise."
"OK." Buffy moved out of the way but held on to her sister's shoulder for a few seconds. "But you know you can talk to me about anything, right? Whatever it is."
Dawn gave her a quick hug. "I know. Love ya."
"TEN!" Buffy yelled as the door slammed.
Alone in her house, Buffy relaxed a bit. That went reasonably well, she supposed. OK, feelings slightly hurt by the not being let in on until the last second, but... Dawn had spent most of the summer burying herself in research, and it was nice to see her excited about something. Besides, Buffy had to admit, her little sister was growing up fairly responsible and had earned some trust. I mean, just look at the thoroughness of her research methods, she thought as she casually strolled over to the bookcase and casually pulled down a volume completely at random that just happened to be the same one Dawn had mentioned had information on her not-boyfriend. By an extraordinary coincidence, it opened to page 421. Buffy casually wondered how Giles would react at Dawn making notes in his precious books, noting cross references, doodling around a couple of words, underlining and highlighting bits like "diurnal", "vegetarian", "non-violent", and -
- and come to think of it, Buffy had earned some time off herself. Treating herself to coffee and a movie sounded like a good idea. She did have this new trenchcoat and sunglasses she'd been meaning to try on. She'd just sit inconspicuously in a corner, watching the people. Couldn't hurt to keep up with what the kids were up to these days. Maybe underlining "anatomically compatible with Homo Sapiens" in books was just some new teenage fad.
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Date: 2014-12-31 02:52 pm (UTC)Definitely less squicky than Xander/Dawn or Connor/Dawn.
I know, right? In the choice between kinda-incestuous and completely-shoehorned-for-age-reasons, I'll take a third option any time.