beer_good_foamy

Here's a fic for this year's spook_me ficathon and also for... I think the "Inside Out" square on my buffyversebingo card.

Title: Player Piano
Author: Beer Good (beer_good_foamy)
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, post-series
Characters/Pairing: Dawn
Rating: PG13
Word count: ~1000
Summary: When Dawn was six years old, her dad got her a music box. No biggie, it's just a music box, just a childhood toy she's kept for all these years, a tune she occasionally hums. Just a small part of the pool of memories and quirks that make a person. And obviously she should have more important stuff on her mind after Sunnydale turned into a giant crater. So why does the world suddenly seem so quiet?

Written for spook_me, the prompt "evil toys" and this picture.

From the moment of my birth to the instant of my death
There are patterns I must follow just as I must breathe each breath
Like a rat in a maze the path before me lies
And the pattern never alters until the rat dies
- Paul Simon

( Dawn never actually had a sixth birthday. She's asked Dad in one of their increasingly rare phone calls if he remembers going there; he does. Czechoslovakia no longer exists. The airline went bankrupt in 1994. Apart from the music box there is no physical evidence that he ever went there. )

It's the annual holiday fic! I felt kind of bad about last year's fic and how it anticipated some real-life events, so I went extra fluffy this time. Happy whatever, everyone!

Title: A Slayin' Song Tonight
Author: Beer Good (beer_good_foamy)
Fandom: Buffyverse (post-series)
Rating: PG13
Word count: 6x100
Characters: Ensemble
Summary: Five holiday decorations that can be used to slay vampires, and one vice versa. AKA the Scooby Holiday Meet-Up is about as peaceful as you'd expect.

In retrospect, renting a Cleveland hotel ballroom for the annual Scooby Holiday Meet-Up wasn't the best idea. But Buffy's tiny apartment wouldn't hold them all, and the hotel promised food, drinks and holiday paraphernalia at a very decent price (as thanks for clearing up that haunting three weeks earlier).

The vampire gang who (somewhat unwisely) cut the power and crashed the party without needing an invitation presumably weren't part of the service.

"Just once," Buffy muttered as she pulled a Christmas stocking over one vampire's face and staked another, "I'd like one holiday to go according to plan."

* * *

"Um… little help?" Dawn managed to get out as she bounced up and down on the back of the largest vampire. She wasn't sure what she'd been thinking when she tried to choke him with a holiday wreath; pine needles really weren't sharp enough to sever a vampire neck, and now he was trying to throw her off and she hated horsey rides and the eggnog she'd had wasn't helping, and -

When Spike dusted the vamp she tried for a graceful landing, but inertia disagreed and she crashed through the tree, sending angels, candy canes and baubles flying everywhere. "...Ow."

* * *

"OW! Sonofabitch!" Stepping on a bauble is painful even if you're a soulless denizen of the night. One vampire hopped around the room, knocking over the buffet table while trying to pull shards of glass out of his foot, then decided to take his rage out on the old man. "Any last words, grandpa?"

"Merry Christmas?" Giles handed him the gift Buffy had given him. "I suppose as my nemesis, this belongs to you."

The vampire ripped off the wrapping paper, took one look at the knitted sweater with reindeer motif, screamed and dusted.

Giles nodded. "I thought as much."

* * *

"Thanks, Will." Xander brushed off the ashes from the vampire that had been seconds away from a double shot of AB Harris Positive. "Also, huh. I never knew menorahs hurt vampires, but I guess...?"

Willow winced as she carefully checked the abruptly extinguished menorah for vampire-ass-related damage. "May just have been regular vampire fire allergy. It's just... I know I'm not so much with the monotheism these days, and I use crosses to fend off vampires and that's probably some sorta cultural appropriation, but it still feels disrespectful, y'know?" She carefully put it back in the window. "Right. Any more?"

* * *

The last vampire had had enough; nobody had said anything about an army of professional demon hunters. Not wanting to leave empty-handed, he grabbed one of the presents and ran for the door. He almost made it, but then something sparkly flew over his head, slipped down over him and tightened around his legs. He fell face-first, and barely had time to register that someone had landed on his back before a stake pierced his heart.

"Nice one, Blue," Faith said as she holstered the stake.

Illyria dusted off her quickly improvised tinsel lasso. "One does not mess with Texas."

* * *

"Is that it?" Buffy surveyed the damage. "OK, our security deposit's a bust. Aw, the tree."

"Yeah, a vamp did that," Dawn quickly said.

"And one threw your gift on the fire," Giles added. "There's evil for you."

Faith wrenched the remains of the tree upright. "Angel, you wanna be on top?"

Angel ignored Spike's laugh and instead gave Buffy a boost so she could tie Mr Pointy to the top of the tree. A warm glow spread from the few candles that were still lit as the gang stood around with their arms around each other. "Happy holidays, everyone."

The first of two spook_me fills.

Title: Canaries in a Coalmine
Author: Beer Good (beer_good_foamy)
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, post-series
Rating: PG13
Word count: ~1900
Characters/Pairing: Dawn, Faith
Author's Note: Written for spook_me and the prompt "Disease"
Summary: The first symptoms of widespread amnesia mostly went unnoticed even by those not affected. No one's quite sure at what point it became a global pandemic, or how it spreads. But anything is better than nothing, Dawn thinks as they travel towards the last hope for a cure.

( They can't even come up with a good name for it. Or rather, they can't stand the only name that fits it. 'Nothing', the fog that rises up out of nowhere and erases the people it afflicts, memory by memory. )

So here's a fic I found loitering half-finished on my hard drive. Reading mcjulie's post on Hell's Bells some time ago, I realised there's a minor character in Buffy who gets a few intriguing lines, who openly flirts with one of the scoobies, and has, to the best of my knowledge, never had any fic written about him: that demon guy with the horns that Dawn talks to at Anya and Xander's wedding. Hell, even the script just mentions him as Demon Teen. So I started wondering, and... well, here's what came out.

ETA: There's now a spin-off fic for this one, by dragonyphoenix: Extraneous Tomes

Title: The Brian Situation
Author: Beer Good (beer_good_foamy)
Fandom: Buffy, post-season 6
Rating: PG13
Word count: ~950
Summary: Dawn has a date. Buffy has mom hair.

( HORNS? Your date is a demon? )

Two drabbles for open_on_sunday's prompt "Key".

Missing

They let Giles collect Jenny's personal effects when they release the body. $37 in cash, a few protective charms, a picture of (he assumes) her family, and a keychain.

Over the next few days of Arranging Things, he gets to use her keys. There's two for the double locks on her door, a master key for the school, a car key, a couple for various boxes … And an old iron key that doesn't fit anywhere.

He keeps the key for years, but never figures out what it opens. Whatever it is, it'll stay locked forever, removed from the world.

---

A Minor Misunderstanding

High above Sunnydale, Doc flashed his knife and grinned at Dawn. "Hey, kid? Wanna see a trick?" Dawn, understandably, screamed.

Doc quickly pulled out a small device, checked it, and shouted to Glory's minions below, "C SHARP!"

"…What?" Dawn stared at him.

Doc held up a digital guitar tuner. "You scream in C sharp," he smiled. "That's all we needed for the chant to send Glorificus home."

"Aren't you going to bleed me?"

He frowned. "Do you want me to?"

Dawn shook her head.

"Good. We've tried to tell your sister for months, all we needed was the right key."

ETA: Woah, just checked the news. Hope everyone in the path of angry nature is keeping safe.

Coming off the meme I posted yesterday, one ficlet and one drabble.

Title: Dawn Summers Solves Things With SCIENCE!
Author: Beer Good (beer_good_foamy)
Fandom: Buffyverse, post-”Chosen”
Word count: 350
Characters: Dawn, Faith, possibly Dawn/Faith
Rating: PG13
Warning:: Drunkenness, wandering hands
Summary: snowpuppies wanted “drunk!Dawn, Gen with Buffy or slashy with Faith, preferably.”

( Something was rubbing against her nose, was Dawn’s first muddled thought. )


Title: Somebody To Shove
Author: Beer Good (beer_good_foamy)
Fandom: Buffyverse
Word count: 100
Characters: Angel, Riley
Rating: PG13
Summary: darkpoole wanted “Angel and Riley forced to share a bed.”

( Move. )

OK, so here's a plotbunny I've been poking at for a while. I've tried to work it into both series and post-series fic, as drama and as comedy, as drabble and as longfic... So I finally decided to post it tonight because it coincides with Mark reaching "Homecoming", and he has to go and point out the exact detail that this fic depends on. Gnnn... Oh well. Anyways, here we go.

Title: 67 Characters In Search Of A Memory
Author: Beer Good (beer_good_foamy)
Rating: PG13 except for the swearing
Characters/Pairing: Buffy/Faith...ish. Depends on who you ask.
Timeline:
Warnings: ***Teenage drunkenness, awkward confessions***
Word count: ~1800
Summary: It's Dawn's prom. Yay! Unfortunately, it's also the return of the plot of "Homecoming", which means Buffy and Faith must once again save high schoolers from disaster... Or does it?

( I'm talking about Slayerfest. What are you talking about? )

OK, here's a rather silly plotbunny I got a while back and have been working on off and on for far too long. This is set in roughly the same post-series scenario as "Early To Rise" – ie a couple of years after "Chosen", Cleveland, Spike/Buffy, and a slight sense that this could have been a crossover with the Middleman-verse except it's not.

Title: Buffy Summers in "The Volatile Vampire Venture!"
Author: Beer Good (beer_good_foamy)
Fandom: Buffyverse,
Word Count: ~5200
Rating: PG13; some naughtyness, though mostly implied.
Pairing/Characters: Buffy/Spike. Also starring Dawn, Vi, Xander and Faith.
Summary: Just as it seems that things are starting to run smoothly in Cleveland, the Slayers have to face a brand new enemy. Also, Spike is in mortal danger from... Buffy? And what's up with Dawn's secret weapon? And what happened to Buffy's face?!? Find out what happens when vampires stop sucking and start blowing. ...Up.

"Anyone touches anything, it's John Lee Hooker time!" - John Crichton

( It was a dark and actually rather nice night. The bats were chirping, a lone cloud was fluffing its way past the moon in a reasonably atmospheric manner, and in a cemetery in Cleveland, another round of the eternal dance between good and evil had just begun. )

This is for deird1, who wanted a drabble about whipped cream.

When You Have To Go There
Post-NFA

After Dawn answers the door, they stare at each other for what feels like minutes.

“Is she in?” Spike finally asks.

“Patrolling. Creepy Roman catacombs.”

“Right.” He wraps the coat around himself, looking old and tired.

“We heard about LA. How did you... what about...”

“Long story.”

“Oh.” She nods. “Come in.”

Spike parks himself at the kitchen table, looking far away, doesn't look up until she puts a cup of hot cocoa in front of him. “Welcome home.” There's whipped cream melting on top, and he grips the cup tight.

First of all: Woah, it seems LJ is almost working this morning. Definite step up.

Second of all: Weee! Thanks so much!

As always, banner by the ridiculously fantastic xlivvielockex

Third of all, a little something I whipped up for the open_on_sunday challenge "Move".

No Souvenirs

It's about 48 hours after Sunnydale collapses, after the shock starts to dull, after they've refueled the bus and loaded up on necessities, before they remember things they left behind.

Books. Clothes. Rings. Stuffed pigs. Photo albums. Everything they'd have packed in boxes marked 'FRAGILE' and brought along if they'd known they weren't coming back. It's silly, really. It's just stuff, hooks to hang memories on. Not really important.

Dawn could tell them that, she's sorta used to travelling light. Instead, when nobody's looking, she quietly slips the last existing picture of Tara from her wallet into Willow's new purse.