beer_good_foamy

I finally got around to finishing this one. Well, it's as finished as it's ever going to be. Someday I will write the big Buffyverse/Twin Peaks explain-everything crossover, but for now, this is a standalone.

Anyway, all you crazy kids with your Supernatural and Harry Potter crossovers, get off my lawn - I’m going old skool on your asses with this pairing: Faith Lehane of the Buffyverse and Audrey Horne of Twin Peaks. This was originally a request from spuffyduds; her take on it is here, mine is below.



Title: A Code Waiting To Be Broken
Author: Beer Good (beer_good_foamy)
Rating: PG13
Word Count: ~1100
Fandom: Buffyverse/Twin Peaks. Roughly Angel s2, so about 10 years after the Twin Peaks finale.
Pairing: Faith/Audrey (vague allusions to Faith/Buffy and Audrey/Cooper)
Disclaimer: These characters are the property of Joss Whedon, David Lynch, Mark Frost and their various production companies. If I make money off of them, feel free to toss me in the same jail as the characters.
Prompt: spuffyduds: "Faith. Audrey. Prison. Shower."

"The good Dale is in the lodge and can't leave." (Annie Blackburn)

( Through the darkness of future past... )

ETA: Far be it from me to forget this: Mission Accomplished won an award at the Rogue Poet Awards! Huge thanks!

( Banner )

And once again, speakr2customrs comes back with a response in the form of a deliciously groanworthy drabble. But I will not be denied! The War of the Rings continues - this time, with a slightly longer fic including a pairing that I do believe is rather popular on my flist. (See tag for previous entries.)

Title: Hey Mr Clean, You're Dirty Now Too
Author: Beer Good (beer_good_foamy)
Rating: PG13 for nudity
Word Count: 400
Fandom: Lord of the Rings (Movieverse)/Buffy

( Splish splash, I was taking a bath )

I think it's safe to say that this is the crackiest pairing I've ever written. This was written for keyblade277, whose post at fanficrants is partly responsible for my muse going completely insane. I'm just going to post this before I think better of it.

Title: Stop Touching My Magic Bone!
Author: Beer Good (beer_good_foamy)
Rating: R
Fandom: Discworld/He-Man
Pairing: Skeletor/Death
Word count: 600 or so

( Rockin' Bones! )

OK, so I'm really supposed to be working on something for the audio drama Between the Lines (and I am, really, I promise) but a while back I was thinking about that line in "End of Days", when Faith gets to hold the scythe for the first time:

FAITH: It feels like... like it's mine. Guess that means it's yours.

Out of this came two completely unrelated ficlets about Faith and the scythe – one happy femslash thing and one dark and angsty deathfic. Enjoy!

Title: Brazilian
Author: Beer Good (beer_good_foamy)
Timeline: Few months
Rating: R
Length: 500
Summary: Needs smut must.
Pairing: Buffy/Faith.
Disclaimer: I am Joss. I make money off these characters. *jungle full of cicadas chirp as everyone stares in disbelief* Yeah, I didn't believe it either.

( Smooth operator )

Title: Good Girls Go To Heaven – Bad Girls Go Anywhere
Author: Beer Good (beer_good_foamy)
Timeline: A few years
Rating: R
Length: 888
Summary: Faith fights another kind of angel.
Warning: Character death
Disclaimer: If man is five, then the devil is six. And if the devil is six, then God is seven. And if God is seven, then Joss is eight. At least when it comes to his characters.



( Hell ain't a bad place to be )

Two little things... OK, one of them is littler than the other, at least in terms of word count.

First of all, a drabble written for still_grrr's prompt "New Season":

Title: Hanging on in Quiet Desperation Is the English Way
Author: Beer Good (beer_good_foamy)
Rating: PG13
Word Count: 100
Prompt: New Season (001)
Characters: Willow, Giles

( Going All Dumbledore )

---

Second of all, here's a stand-aloneish coda to my previously posted fic "Wow". Hadn't really planned to continue it, but femslash_today's v-day porn battle had the prompt "Buffy/Faith sunshine" which seemed to fit, so... OK, this isn't THAT porny, in fact it's probably one of the schmoopiest things I've written, but still.

Title: Am I The Good Slayer Now?
Author: Beer Good (beer_good_foamy)
Rating: R
Word Count: roughly 750

( Am I The Good Slayer Now? )

Happy birthday somercet!

Which seems like a good excuse to post this. Though I probably would have anyway.

Title: Wow
Author: Beer Good (beer_good_foamy)
Rating: R
Pairing: Willow, Tara, Buffy, Faith in various permutations
Timeline: "Who Are You?"
Word count: About 3500 words. Holy crap.
Disclaimer: Joss is a respected writer who would never lower himself to writing this. I am not him, evidently. I own nothing, I earn nothing.
Summary: All Willow and Tara had to do was keep their hands off each other long enough to perform a spell to put Faith and Buffy back in each others' bodies. Now, really, how many ways can that go wrong? Well, quite a few, as it turns out...

This is a totally gratuitous piece of femmeslash, written only for the amusement of me and others with a similar sense of humour. It started out as a drabble, continued as an ill-fated attempt at smut, and I think it ended up as baudy French farce. But it should be fun.



Nominated at the Crossing Over Awards!


( Wow )

My usual two weekly drabbles for open_on_sunday. Prompt: "Memorial".

( Dedication (Giles, PG) )


( Way Too Late (Buffy/Faith, PG13/R or so) )

It is. Really. I blame the beer.

But spuffyduds asked for fics where Lorne actually gets to have sex. And then there was a song on the radio, and... what the hell. I've written VampDawn/Drusilla, Buffy/Clem and PuppetWerewolfAngel/Mr Gordo, so when you think about it, this... is still weird. Really.

Rating: R-ish
Pairing: Lorne/well...
Word count: 100

( Can't Help Falling In Love )

Features one of the weirdest slash pairings I've ever written, Adam Baldwin playing two roles at the same time, and Spike finally telling Angel how he feels. Lots of fun. Again, let's make fun of the Broody Dark Avenger.

Title: Gonna Make You Bark
Author: Beer Good (beer_good_foamy)
Rating: PG13
Word Count: ~6500
Fandom: Angel, s5
Characters: AtS gang; Angel/Nina, Angel/?, Spike/Buffy (hinted), Wes/Fred
Disclaimer: Joss owns all characters, Jack London owns the last line.
Summary: PuppetAngel has a problem. Well, duh. OK, let me rephrase that: he has more than one problem. Things go horribly, dreadfully, and adorably wrong after 'Smile Time' when it turns out that werewolf bites are, well, werewolf bites. Silliness level: high.

GONNA MAKE YOU BARK

Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4 - Chapter 5 - Chapter 6 - Epilogue

( Chapter 1: No, Nina! Bad Nina! )
( Chapter 2: Fine Furried Friends )
( Chapter 3: Meet the new boss )
( Chapter 4: Piggyback Mountain )
( Chapter 5: Feelin' Blue )
( Chapter 6: Of Wolf And Man...pire )
( Epilogue: Alley Cats )

Title: Five By Five By Five By...
Author: Beer Good (beer_good_foamy)
Timeline:
Rating: PG13
Length: 1400-ish
Summary: A Faith/Buffy slashfic with a difference. Quite a few differences, really. Except not that different. Actually, they're pretty much identical. Confusing? Don't worry, all shall be explained. Even the abnormally high number of roles played by Eliza Dushku.
Characters: Buffy, Faith, Faith, Faith, Faith, Faith...
Disclaimer: Joss rows the boat ashore, hallelujah! Joss owns the characters, hallelu-u-u-jah!



( Five By Five By Five By... )